Personal leadership · Proving to Scaling
Keeping your manager on board
Your manager hears what they need to know in time, bad news included, and knows what you need from them.
Worth reading first: Owning your work, The one-to-one
Does this sound familiar?
- Your manager hears from a client that something went wrong, and you'd known for a week.
- You send a long email with everything in it, and get asked what you actually mean.
- You're waiting for an answer from your manager, and your work has ground to a halt.
- In your one-to-one they ask 'anything else?', and you say 'no, all fine', while something's bothering you.
- You hope a delay will sort itself out, and say nothing yet.
Who it's for, and when
For anyone with a manager or an owner above them, including people who lead a team themselves. In an early phase your manager is often the founder, and they pick up a lot just by sitting next to you. That changes once they're no longer part of everything: from then on, they only know what you tell them.
The model
You and your manager need each other. They need your work to hit their goals, and you need them for decisions, resources and information. Gabarro and Kotter wrote that people who actively work on that relationship do better. What they mean is working together on purpose, so it works for both of you and for the company.
Start with them. What are they judged on, what's worrying them right now, and how do they take things in? Gabarro and Kotter talk about readers and listeners: one wants it on paper first and then a conversation, the other wants to hear it and read it afterwards. If you know which, you can bring it in a way that lands.
Bring bad news early. What a manager can least handle is a surprise. The sooner they know, the more they can still do. And if you tell them in time when something's going wrong, they'll believe you when you say it's going well. You're the first to know what's happening in your work. Making sure they hear it is your job; they can't ask about something they don't know exists.
Say what you need, too. They don't automatically know you're waiting on them. The lesson The one-to-one is written for your manager, and says there that the conversation is yours. This lesson is about what you bring to it. How to raise a single problem, with a recommendation, is in the lesson Owning your work.
John J. Gabarro and John P. Kotter, Managing Your Boss, Harvard Business Review, 1980. One of HBR's most reprinted articles, published as a short book in its own right in 2008.
1. What they need to know
Anything that affects their goals: a client, a deadline, money, a colleague who's stuck. The rest can go in a short list, or doesn't need saying.
2. When
If it affects a client, money or a fixed date, straight away, the same day. Save the rest for the one-to-one. If you're not sure, say it sooner.
3. How
The news first, in one sentence. Then what it affects, what you're already doing, and what you need from them. On paper for a reader, a call first for a listener.
4. What you need
A decision, a contact, time, or a clear choice between two jobs. Say what, and by when. They won't know you're waiting unless you tell them.
Pitfalls
Holding bad news until you have a fix
You want a solution before you say anything. By then they hear it too late. Say it now, with what you already know, and come back with your recommendation.
Your manager as the enemy, or as a safety net
People who keep everything from their manager and people who dump everything on them are doing the same thing: they're not working with them. Gabarro and Kotter saw both often, in people who meant well.
Watch and read
Three minutes on how to take bad news to your manager: the news first, then what you're doing about it.
Watch on YouTubeHow to have influence as a number two and help the person above you, in two minutes.
Watch on YouTubeRead
Managing Your Boss
John J. Gabarro en John P. Kotter · 2008 · ISBN 9781422122884
The 1980 article as a short book in the Harvard Business Review Classics series, 64 pages. You'll finish it in an hour, and it's still the best explanation there is.
View the bookApply it
- 1
Get to know your manager
Answer the five questions below. If you don't know an answer, ask them in your next one-to-one. It's a normal thing to ask.
- 2
Agree what they want to know straight away
Ask it out loud: 'What do you want to hear straight away, and what can wait until our one-to-one?' Write the answer down.
- 3
Bring a list to your one-to-one
Using the format below. Add to it during the week, so you don't forget anything and don't have to keep popping in.
The one-to-one - 4
Bring bad news the same day
As soon as you know a date, a client or an amount isn't going to work out. With what you already know, and when you'll come back. How to renegotiate a commitment yourself in time is in the lesson Commitments you keep.
Commitments you keep
Examples
Ready to use: five questions about your manager
What are they judged on this quarter? What's worrying them most right now? Would they rather read it, or hear it? How much detail do they want: the headlines, or everything? What do they want to know straight away, and what can wait until the one-to-one?
Ready to use: your list for the one-to-one
What I promised, and where it stands. What I can see coming: what might go wrong, and when. What I decided myself, so you know. What I need you for: a decision, a contact, a choice. And by when. What's bothering me, even if it's small. Start with the point you're dreading most.
Ready to use: a message with bad news, wrong and right
Wrong: 'Hi, quick update on the project. We've done a lot over the past few weeks, the supplier was a bit slow, and the client had a few more changes. I think it might be a bit later, but we're doing our best. Cheers.' Now they don't know what's going to be later, by how much, or whether they need to do anything. Right: 'Delivery to the client is moving from 12 to 19 December. Cause: the supplier is delivering a week late. I'll ring the client tomorrow morning and suggest we still deliver the first part on 12 December. What I need from you: do you want to ring the client yourself, or shall I? I'll let you know on Friday what the client said.'
A salesperson waiting on a decision
He's been waiting two weeks for sign-off on a non-standard price. In his one-to-one he says: 'I need your sign-off by Thursday, or the client goes elsewhere. This is my recommendation, and this is what it costs us.' The sign-off comes before the meeting ends. His manager hadn't known it was waiting.
Do this in your own business
Everything up to here is free. What you fill in for your own business, you keep in Boldcaster.
- You look back on a situation from your own work. Only you can read what you write.
- You set a date with yourself, and on that day the app asks how it went.
- You assign the lesson to your team and see who has done it.
- The quiz counts towards your progress, and you see which lesson comes next.
Four weeks free. You'll land straight in this lesson.
Quiz
6 situations. You need 5 of 6 right. You can try again at any time.
1.On Monday you can see that a delivery due on Friday isn't going to happen. You don't have a solution yet. When do you tell your manager?
2.You need to email your manager that a delivery to a client is moving back a week. What goes in the first sentence?
3.Your manager never reads your long emails, but if you give them a quick call they decide on the spot. What do you do with an important decision?
4.You've been waiting a week and a half for your manager to get back to you about a quote. What do you do?
5.At the end of your one-to-one your manager asks 'anything else?'. You've been worried about the workload in your team for weeks. What do you do?
6.You made a decision that was yours to make: a different supplier for one job. Does your manager need to know?
Nothing is saved here. In the app, the quiz counts towards your progress.
Read next
- Starting the day well · Every morning you pick three things that have to get done today, and if you lead a team you hold a fifteen-minute daily start where everyone says where they're stuck.
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